The Liar

I'm officially done with The Adult, so it's time to move on. I currently have 3 dates scheduled for this week & here is the update on Date #1. 

His name makes him sound worse than he really is. According to his profile he is a single Hispanic man that lives in Kansas City who works in finance. Now most of these things are in fact true. 

After chatting for a couple of weeks we agreed to meet at a Mexican restaurant. He chose Chuy's, which he spelled Chewy's. (This should have been Hint #1!) He showed up about 5 minutes late even though he used to live right by the restaurant. He was clearly nervous, but that's to be expected. He told me about his day with his mom which included telling off her neighbor who took down part of her fence because the neighbor was "taking advantage of living by a woman who lives by herself." Now granted the neighbor guy sounded like a jerk, but there is a theme here to being treated poorly. Dinner goes on with him asking many interview type questions & even comments that he hates first dates because they feel like interviews. I've never been asked on a date what my long term goals are, so that was a new one. About 1/2 way through dinner I was just talking like normal & he asks me if I like Seinfeld. I tell him that I've watched several episodes. He says, "But do you like it." I repeat that I've seen several episodes, but not every one. He then says, "I feel like I'm on a date with Seinfeld. If you could just do the voice that would be amazing." I'm going to take this as a compliment I guess. 

I went into this date a little apprehensive because although he was nice, I wasn't super attracted to him. I decided that I needed to meet him though to give him a fair chance. I wasn't really feeling it, so I made up an excuse about having to work on grade card comments and that I needed to translate them. He says, "Why do you need to translate them?" Ummm, because the parents don't all speak English. He asks if I teach at a special school. Ummmm, no, just a neighborhood school. He still seems confused, so I explain that my school is in a predominantly Hispanic neighborhood & many of the parents are not strong in English. He looks baffled & says, "Huh, I thought I was culturally aware, but I guess I'm not." (This should have been Hint #2)  

Just then he asks me if he told me the story about him at the liquor store. He then says, "I'm sure you saw my name on my credit card." (For the record, I didn't even glance at the bill or his credit card. After last week, I was just glad I didn't have to pay.) "I know I told you my name was 'Phil' but it's actually 'Parsa.' So the lady at the liquor store looks at my credit card and then says, 'That's an interesting name. Where are you from?' I give her my usual answer, 'Olathe.' But then she says, but where are your parents from? I lie & say they are from here because immigration is a big issue for some people." (To be honest, I want to know where his parents are from at this point because 'Parsa' is DEFINITELY not a Hispanic name!) The lady then shows his ID to a couple of people in the liquor store commenting on what a unique name it is. He gets pissed with the lady & asks for his ID & credit card back because he is taking is business elsewhere. Now I know I have never been in this situation before, but I think there are some very different ways he could've handled this. I honestly think the lady was just curious as to how he got his name. I then learn that he was born in Pakistan (a LONG way from any Spanish speaking & therefore Hispanic country) & only lived there for 1 month before moving to America. I have no problem with this whatsoever, but why lie about it? If you're nervous about people not wanting to be with you because you are Middle Eastern, those are not the type of people you want to be with anyway. Also, why pick Hispanic? Your country is closer to the Caucasus Mountains (from which the word Caucasian comes from), why not just say you're Caucasian then? I left the date baffled. He definitely wants to see me again, but people who aren't comfortable with their ethnicity are not for me.

Time of death: When he called me Seinfeld (You didn't see that coming did you?)